“Love at First Fight” by Carey and Dena Dyer



If you were to make an acronym from the first letters of the title, it would spell LAFF. And that’s what you’ll do as you read this book—laugh. Especially if you’ve been married for more than, oh, 24 hours.

It’s no wonder the book is often funny. If you’ve seen Carey and Dena Dyer perform, they bring down the house. They can also make you tear up, as when they sing a duet (my favorite is when they do Roy Orbison’s “Crying”).

And that’s how this books works—some laughing, some crying, some thought-provoking. Like the Dyers, we’ve faced challenges in which we realized, as Dena writes, “This is how people split up. (I’d never thought that before.)”

Here are a couple of quotes from the introduction:

“If marriage is a font, then ours is Wingdings. We’ve tried being something more respectable, like Times New Roman or Courier, but alas, some couples are destined for weirdness.

As you read through the book, you may notice that the pieces gradually get more serious as we both realized the requirements for a fulfilling life together. Like many couples, we started out naïve and progressed to frustrated. Next, we took a detour to discouragement and disillusionment. After a period of true despondency, in which we despaired of making it through together, we found a new level of commitment and joy in our marriage.”

Love at First Fight is a set of 52 devotionals divided into five sections: “Coming Out Swinging,” “Treating Our Wounds,” “Retreating to Our Corners,” “Needing a Referee,” and “Still Standing.” The story-based meditations are each only a couple of pages long and include a Bible verse, He Says and She Says, a prayer, questions for discussion, and a quote from someone married considerably longer than 24 hours.

John and I started reading through the book together. After 24 years of marriage we’ve seen each other change in response to events we could never have imagined when we were newlyweds. We’ve also grown closer through those times and become more like each other—I can often enjoy college football now, and John doesn’t mind poetry so much. One question in the book that I liked was “How did you make it through?” Now that we’ve made it through a few things, as the Dyers have, it gives us hope that maybe we can make it through whatever comes next. Because now we know that there is always a next.

That’s why this is a great gift for newly married or soon-to-be married couples, the ones who think their love is strong enough for anything. It may be. But until you’ve walked through a few Anythings, you don’t really know the truth of Song of Solomon 8:6 (MSG):

Love is invincible facing danger and death.”


  1. Heather Garcia says

    Seriously. I caught myself looking around as I finished your last sentence, searching for a pen to jot down the book title.

    Then I stopped and chuckled (the silent kind that happens when everyone in the house is asleep) as I realized you get me every. single. time. Case in point, I just ordered the audiobook of “The Curious of the Dog in the Night-Time” thanks to another of your blog posts.

    One of my major weaknesses — a Megan Willome book review. 😉